Monday, March 30, 2009

i am a little church (no great cathedral)

i am a little church(no great cathedral)
far from the splendor and squalor of hurrying cities
-i do not worry if briefer days grow briefest,
i am not sorry when sun and rain make april

my life is the life of the reaper and the sower;
my prayers are prayers of earth's own clumsily striving
(finding and losing and laughing and crying)children
whose any sadness or joy is my grief or my gladness

around me surges a miracle of unceasing
birth and glory and death and resurrection:
over my sleeping self float flaming symbols
of hope,and i wake to a perfect patience of mountains

i am a little chruch(far from the frantic
world with its rapture and anguish)at peace with nature
-i do not sorry if longer nights grow longest;
i am not sorry when silence becomes singing

winter by spring,i lift my diminutive spire to 
merciful HIm Whose only now is forever:
standing erect in the deathless truth of His presence
(welcoming humbly His light and proudly His darkness)

-ee cummings

Friday, March 27, 2009

These things I know for sure


  • A good hug is worth so much more than a thousand words
  • Being merciful feels better than standing justified... in the long run
  • I'm always going to remember these years of my life
  • Good friends and good food = a few of my favorite things
  • Mojito Mambo Odwalla drinks are delicious
  • This summer I'm traveling over 1000 miles away to experience life in another part of the world, oddly enough right after I've found mine here
  • Listening to Paramore makes me feel cooler than I actually am
  • There's nothing as peaceful the sun shining on the snow
  • I miss Mandy
  • Something wonderful is coming
  • The shadow really does prove the sunshine 

No bird soars too high
if he soars with his own wings.
- William Blake

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

The Kind of Girl I Am

The other day I was standing in line and overheard a group of girls talking about "what kind of girl" they each were. I listened to each girl go around and list of her favorite qualities about herself and sum it up into one word. To my dismay I ACTUALLY heard one girl say, "I think I'm a 'pink' girl because I'm just peppy, fun, care-free, and just so pinky!" *Shiver*

Despite having a disparaging moment of grief for my entire generation because of this child, it made me wonder... What kind of girl am I?

I'm writing a song about this and I'll update it later, but it's been really interesting think about. Suggestions would be welcome :) 

P.S. If you are a girl reading my blog and you happen to think of yourself as a "pink girl," please do society-at-large a favor and go read a book. Authors like Stephanie Myers, Paris Hilton, and trash romance novels do not count. 

Sunday, March 22, 2009

Because I care

I always used to hate the song "Free Fallin" because it upset me that someone would, in theory, okay with treating the girl in the first verse that way. However, after meeting people like that, I have to say I don't feel sorry for the girl with the broken heart, but the singer. 

It's such a sad thing when people hurt others and disconnect themselves and are so selfish that they don't even care when they crush others. Sad day. Just a thought. 

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

got your back

So, I'm at Bongo Java right now, skipping class, and doing one of my favorite activities: eavesdropping. It is glorious outside AND I think I struck gold. 

There are about six guys, probably in their twenties and/or thirties, all drinking coffee and smoking very strong smelling cigarettes, sitting on the porch next to me (the weather is nice so it's crowded) talking about their relationships. I love this because I feel like it's rare for me to be able to hear real guy talk without influencing what is being said due to my presence, as a female. Therefore, naturally I had to blog about it.
(Blog... what a silly word). 

The man in the funny hat is telling everyone how his girl friend and he have been dating for over a year and he is upset because he feels like she apparently treats him like he "isn't enough" for her. He hasn't proposed yet and he isn't doing enough and he doesn't have the right job, etc., etc., etc. 

His friend in the green shirt, however, brought up a good point. Sometimes we don't have everything in our lives together (oh man, that's another blog all together: being in the "right place" for a relationship/marriage. hmm to be continued...) but when you're with someone and they don't support you in anything you do it really makes you question, "What am I doing with this person?" Or in his words, "If she doesn't have your back and support your self and your soul, what are you doing with her?" Profound. I know. I wasn't expecting it either. 

And honestly, I think the man in the green shirt hit the nail right on the head.  And while I'm no expert, obviously, here is my weigh-in:

It's all about how we treat each other. 

Do you want a good relationship? Well it helps to find someone you click with, because you can't fake chemistry, and good circumstances really help... a lot (maybe more than we realize). But at the end of the day when you find two people who come together and form a relationship based off of an attitude of, "Hey, you know what? I like you. I think you're wonderful. And I know you're a screw up and you're going to keep screwing up. I'm a screw up and I'm going to keep screwing up. But that's okay and we'll figure this out. I want to support you and help you understand that you were put here on this earth for a reason and you are valuable. I want to work together to build a life that is honoring to God and is based directly out of His love and I want to treat you the way God would be happy with me for treating you. All I want is for you to excel, be yourself, and I' going to do whatever I can to treat you well. No secret motives. No hidden agendas. No using or abusing. I just want to be here for you and with you. " 

Call me idealistic, but if both parties treated the other one that way, I'd say that's a pretty healthy place to begin. 

And why is this SO HARD for us??? Well, I know it all goes back to a snake in a garden and I know, from personal experience, we'll never get it completely right. But I think it's such a shame if we don't try with everything we have and then to realize that Jesus will fill in the cracks. 

Thursday, March 12, 2009